Author Guide · Relationship Psychology
Books Written by
Sue Johnson grew up in the Royal Marine, the pub her parents ran in Gillingham, Kent, watching customers drink, flirt and fight while her parents’ own marriage fell apart; they divorced when she was ten. She arrived at the University of British Columbia in the late 1960s, worked as a counsellor with troubled teenagers and, as a doctoral student in the early 1980s, began videotaping couples in therapy. With her adviser Les Greenberg she turned what she saw into Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), a method built on attachment theory, which treats a couple’s fights as protest at lost connection. Her first book for general readers, Hold Me Tight (2008), has sold more than a million copies in some 30 languages. She died in Victoria, British Columbia, in April 2024. This guide covers her 10 key books, in order, and where to begin.
By Lisanne Swart · 10 key books · 1988–2025 · Updated October 2026
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Quick answer
Sue Johnson wrote ten key books, four of them for general readers: Hold Me Tight (2008), Love Sense (2013), Created for Connection (2016) and The Hold Me Tight Workbook (2022). The other six are clinical books for therapists, from Emotionally Focused Therapy for Couples (1988) to Emotionally Focused Therapy for Trauma (2025). Start with Hold Me Tight; below you will find all ten in order and which to read for which question.
Where to Start with Sue Johnson
If you want her best-known book
→ Hold Me Tight (2008) — seven conversations for couples.
If you want the science behind it
→ Love Sense (2013) — love as an attachment bond.
If you want exercises to do together
→ The Hold Me Tight Workbook (2022) — the companion to Hold Me Tight.
If you are a therapist
→ The Practice of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy (1996) — the core clinical manual of EFT.
10 Sue Johnson Books, in Order
Emotionally Focused Therapy for Couples
The first book on the method, written with Les Greenberg, her doctoral adviser at the University of British Columbia, and published by Guilford. It grew out of the therapy sessions she videotaped and analysed for her doctorate, completed in 1984, and sets out EFT for clinicians: helping partners reach the emotions underneath their arguments and respond to each other differently.
The Practice of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy
Her own manual of EFT, first published in 1996, with a second edition in 2004 and a third in 2019. It explains how a therapist moves a couple through the stages of the model, from calming the cycle of blame and withdrawal to new moments of reaching for each other, with session transcripts throughout. It is the standard text for therapists training in EFT.
Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy with Trauma Survivors
A Guilford book on working with couples in which one or both partners has survived trauma. Johnson argues that a secure relationship can itself help a survivor heal, and shows how the stages of EFT are adapted when fear and distrust run through the relationship.
Hold Me Tight
Her first book for general readers, published by Little, Brown. It turns EFT into seven conversations a couple can have on their own, from Recognizing the Demon Dialogues — the repeating fights she calls Find the Bad Guy, the Protest Polka and Freeze and Flee — through Finding the Raw Spots and Forgiving Injuries to Keeping Your Love Alive. Its argument is that couples do not need to learn to argue better, but to answer the question under every fight: are you there for me? It has sold more than a million copies and been translated into some 30 languages.
Love Sense
A wider book about what science says romantic love is. Building on John Bowlby’s work on infants, Johnson argues that adult love is an attachment bond like the one between parent and child. The first part covers the research, including oxytocin and the link between attachment and sex; the second follows distressed couples through EFT, with exercises at the end of each chapter. Kirkus Reviews called it “a readable combination of research findings and case studies”.
Created for Connection
A version of Hold Me Tight for Christian couples, written with the therapist Kenneth Sanderfer. It keeps the seven conversations and sets them alongside scripture and biblical teaching on love and commitment.
Attachment Theory in Practice
A Guilford book that takes EFT beyond couples. Chapters come in pairs, explaining how attachment science applies first to individual therapy, then to couples and then to families, with case examples and exercises for therapists.
A Primer for Emotionally Focused Individual Therapy
A short Routledge guide, written with the psychologist T. Leanne Campbell, to the individual form of the method for treating depression, anxiety and traumatic stress. It describes the three stages of EFIT and the core sequence of interventions the authors call the “EFIT Tango”, with transcripts and case studies.
The Hold Me Tight Workbook
A companion to Hold Me Tight, published by Little, Brown in December 2022. It works through the same ideas as exercises, conversation prompts and activities for partners to do together, for couples at any stage of a relationship.
Emotionally Focused Therapy for Trauma
Her last book, published by Guilford in December 2025, after her death. Written with T. Leanne Campbell, it is a guide for clinicians on using EFT with individuals, couples and families recovering from chronic, cumulative or sudden trauma, again using the tango as a metaphor for the therapy process.
In What Order to Read Sue Johnson
Johnson wrote for two audiences, and the order matters less than which group you belong to. General readers need only four books: Hold Me Tight, then Love Sense for the science behind it, then The Hold Me Tight Workbook to practise; Created for Connection is the same programme for Christian couples, so read it instead of Hold Me Tight, not after it.
Therapists usually start with The Practice of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy, in its latest edition, and then follow the method as it widened: to trauma survivors in 2002, to individuals and families in Attachment Theory in Practice (2019), and to individual therapy in the Primer and the posthumous trauma book.
A reading path
1. Hold Me Tight (2008)
2. Love Sense (2013)
3. The Hold Me Tight Workbook (2022)
4. Attachment Theory in Practice (2019)
Everything Else Sue Johnson Published
Beyond the 10 key books: 2 more, grouped by kind.
Open a group with the + to see every book in it.
Co-written clinical books
2
2 books · 1994–2005
- 1994From Victim to Survivora group treatment model for women survivors of incest, with B. J. Saxe and others
- 2005Becoming an Emotionally Focused Couple Therapist: The Workbooka training workbook written with Brent Bradley, James Furrow and other EFT trainers
The years · 1947–2024
Quick facts about Sue Johnson
- Known for
- She developed Emotionally Focused Therapy, the attachment-based couple therapy she brought to general readers in Hold Me Tight.
- 1947
- Born in Gillingham, Kent
- 1984
- Doctorate at UBC; joins the University of Ottawa
- 1988
- First EFT book, with Les Greenberg
- 2008
- Hold Me Tight
- 2024
- Dies in Victoria, British Columbia
- Born
- Susan Maureen Driver, 19 December 1947, Gillingham, Kent, England
- Died
- 23 April 2024, Victoria, British Columbia, of a rare melanoma, aged 76
- Education
- B.A. in English, University of Hull (1968); Ed.D. in counselling psychology, University of British Columbia (1984)
- Worked
- Professor of psychology, University of Ottawa; later Alliant International University and UBC
- Founded
- International Centre for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy (ICEEFT), 1998
- Honours
- Member of the Order of Canada and APA Family Psychologist of the Year (both 2016)
- Married
- John Douglas, whom she met in 1987; three children
The red mark is 2008: Hold Me Tight, the book that took her therapy to general readers.
How Sue Johnson Writes: Attachment Science for Couples
Johnson’s books start from one idea taken from John Bowlby: adults need a secure emotional bond with a partner as much as children need one with a parent. She treats most fights as protest at a bond that feels threatened, so the books spend little time on communication skills or childhood history and a great deal on the moment when one partner pursues and the other withdraws.
She writes from the therapy room. Hold Me Tight and Love Sense are built from couples in her practice, quoted at length, whose arguments she slows down to show the fear underneath. She gives the patterns memorable names — Demon Dialogues, the Protest Polka, raw spots — and ends chapters with exercises for partners to do together. The clinical books use the same material in the form of session transcripts.
She also leans on research more than most writers of relationship books. She tested EFT in outcome studies from her doctorate onwards and cites research on oxytocin and attachment in Love Sense; the American Psychological Association lists EFT among evidence-based treatments for couples. For another research-led view of couples, see John Gottman, who called her “the best couple’s therapist in the world”.
Watch
Sue Johnson on Hold Me Tight conversations
On The Tim Ferriss Show in 2021, Johnson explains how couples can move from repeating fights to the “Hold Me Tight” conversations that rebuild a sense of safety.
Frequently asked questions about Sue Johnson’s books
How many books has Sue Johnson written?
Twelve, counting the books she co-wrote. Ten are the key books on this page, from Emotionally Focused Therapy for Couples (1988) to Emotionally Focused Therapy for Trauma (2025); the other two are co-written clinical books, From Victim to Survivor (1994) and an EFT training workbook (2005). She also wrote a short illustrated fable, Edgar & Elouise.
What are Sue Johnson’s books in order?
Emotionally Focused Therapy for Couples (1988), The Practice of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy (1996), Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy with Trauma Survivors (2002), Hold Me Tight (2008), Love Sense (2013), Created for Connection (2016), Attachment Theory in Practice (2019), A Primer for Emotionally Focused Individual Therapy (2022), The Hold Me Tight Workbook (2022) and Emotionally Focused Therapy for Trauma (2025).
Where should I start with Sue Johnson?
With Hold Me Tight (2008), her first book for general readers and the clearest account of her ideas. If you want the science first, read Love Sense (2013); if you are a therapist, start with The Practice of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy.
What is Sue Johnson’s most famous book?
Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love (2008), which has sold more than a million copies and been translated into some 30 languages.
What are the seven conversations in Hold Me Tight?
Recognizing the Demon Dialogues; Finding the Raw Spots; Revisiting a Rocky Moment; Hold Me Tight — Engaging and Connecting; Forgiving Injuries; Bonding Through Sex and Touch; and Keeping Your Love Alive.
What is Emotionally Focused Therapy?
A form of couple therapy based on attachment theory, developed by Johnson and Les Greenberg from her doctoral research at the University of British Columbia in the early 1980s. It treats a couple’s recurring fights as a cycle driven by fear of losing connection, and helps partners express the needs underneath so the other can respond. It has since been extended to individuals and families.
Is EFT evidence-based?
The American Psychological Association recognises it as an evidence-based approach, and Johnson said nearly 75 percent of couples who went through EFT reported being happier in their relationship. Her obituary in The Globe and Mail notes that some therapists questioned the validity of her scientific evidence, and others argued that her focus on attachment leaves out other motives at the core of romantic love.
Is Hold Me Tight only for couples in crisis?
No. Johnson wrote it for couples at any stage, including those who simply want to stay close; the last conversation, Keeping Your Love Alive, is about protecting a bond that is already secure. The Hold Me Tight Workbook (2022) offers the same material as exercises.
Is Sue Johnson still alive?
No. She died on 23 April 2024 in Victoria, British Columbia, of a rare form of melanoma, aged 76. Her last book, Emotionally Focused Therapy for Trauma, written with T. Leanne Campbell, was published in December 2025.
What awards did Sue Johnson receive?
She was appointed a Member of the Order of Canada in 2016, the honour she said she was most proud of, and was named Family Psychologist of the Year by the American Psychological Association’s Society for Couple and Family Psychology the same year. She also received an award for outstanding contribution to marriage and family therapy from the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy.
Footnotes
- Sue Johnson — Wikipedia
- Sue Johnson, psychologist who took a scientific view of love, dies at 76 — The Boston Globe, 2024
- Psychologist Sue Johnson started a global movement — The Globe and Mail, 2024
- In Memoriam: Susan M. Johnson — Guilford Press
- Hold Me Tight — Hachette Book Group
- Love Sense — Kirkus Reviews
Bibliography last verified 9 October 2026. Where sources give different first-publication years, this page uses the year in library catalogues or the publisher’s own record.
This list was not put together by a machine.
The notes are all mine,
and the books are all his.
Lisanne x
Written by Lisanne Swart, who has curated reading lists and author guides at lisanneswart.com since 2021.
See more on her personal bookshelf.
“Love is the best survival mechanism there is.”
— Sue Johnson, Hold Me Tight (2008)
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